Niba wibwiraga ko uzi ibyo abagabo bakeneye mu rukundo, Ibi biragutungura…

Hari ibintu byinshi mu rukundo abantu badakunda kuvuga, ariko bikagira ingaruka zikomeye ku mubano w’abantu babiri. Mu gihe benshi batekereza ko abagabo ari “ba ndakomeye” kandi batajya bakenera amagambo cyangwa kwitabwaho cyane, ukuri ni uko hari ibyifuzo byinshi abagabo bagira ku bagore babo ariko bakabihisha. Si uko batabikeneye, ahubwo ni uko batinya kugaragara nk’abadakomeye cyangwa bakumva ko ibyo bintu “bisanzwe” bidasaba kuvugwa.

Mu by’ukuri, urukundo n’imibanire hagati y’abagabo n’abagore bishingira cyane ku gusobanukirwa no kumva ibyo buri wese akeneye, n’iyo atabivuze mu magambo.

Abagabo benshi bifuza cyane kumva ko bashimirwa kandi ko ibyo bakora bifite agaciro. Nubwo bashobora kugaragara nk’abadafite ikibazo n’uko ibintu bimeze, ijambo rimwe ryoroshye rivuga ngo “ndagushimiye” cyangwa “ndagushimiye ibyo ukora” rishobora kubaha imbaraga zikomeye kurusha uko umuntu yatekereza. Akenshi, abagabo ntibifuza ibintu bihenze cyangwa amagambo menshi; bifuza gusa kumva ko hari uwubona imbaraga bashyira mu rugo no mu buzima bwabo bwa buri munsi.

Ikindi kintu gikomeye abagabo bifuza mu rukundo ni amahoro. Nubwo badakunda kubivuga mu buryo bweruye, benshi bahitamo urugo rutuje kurusha ahahora intonganya n’amakimbirane atagira iherezo. Ibi ntibivuze ko ibibazo bitabaho, ahubwo ni uko uburyo bikemurwa bufite akamaro kanini kurusha ikibazo ubwacyo. Kuganira mu bwitonzi, kumva undi no gushaka ibisubizo aho gushyamirana ni byo abagabo benshi bifuza mu buryo bwimbitse.

Nanone kandi, abagabo bakeneye kumva ko bashyigikiwe mu nzozi zabo n’intego bafite mu buzima. N’iyo iby’inzozi byaba bigaragara nk’ibiri kure cyangwa bigoye kugerwaho, kumva ko hari umuntu wemera ubushobozi bwawe bigira ingaruka zikomeye ku mikorere n’imitekerereze. Umugabo wumva ashyigikiwe n’umugore akunda, akenshi agira icyizere cyisumbuye kandi akarushaho gukora cyane kugira ngo agere ku byo yifuza.

Hari n’ikindi kintu gito ariko gifite agaciro gakomeye abagabo bakunda gusa nkabahisha: kwitabwaho mu bintu bito bya buri munsi. Ubutumwa bugufi bubaza uko umunsi wagenze, kumutekerezaho mu gihe atari kumwe nawe, cyangwa kumwereka ko umwibuka mu buryo bworoheje bishobora gutma yigirira icyizere n’umutekano mu mutima. Nubwo bisa nk’ibintu byoroheje, ni byo bikomeza urukundo buri munsi.

Ubwizerane n’ubudahemuka nabyo biri mu byo abagabo bifuza cyane. Nta rukundo rushobora kubaho neza hatariho icyizere. Iyo umugabo yumva ko yizewe kandi ko afite umutekano mu mubano, aratuza, agakora neza, kandi urukundo rugakomera kurushaho. Nubwo ibi bisa nk’ibisanzwe, akenshi ni byo bigora abantu kubaka no kurinda.

Mu by’ukuri, abagabo benshi ntibavugira mu magambo ibyo bifuza, ariko babigaragaza mu bikorwa, mu myitwarire, no mu buryo bitwara imbere mu mutima. Icy’ingenzi mu rukundo si ugutekereza gusa, ahubwo ni ukugerageza kumva undi n’iyo atavuga.

Urukundo nyarwo si amagambo gusa cyangwa impano zihenze. Ni ukumenya undi, kumva ibyo akeneye, no kubyitaho n’iyo atabigusabye. Iyo ibi byubahirijwe, umubano urakomera, urukundo rugakomera, kandi bombi bakabaho bishimye.

Mu gusoza, gusobanukirwa ibyo mugenzi wawe akeneye mu rukundo ni intambwe ikomeye igana ku mibanire irambye kandi irimo amahoro. Rimwe na rimwe, ibyo duhindura bito nibyo bihindura byose.

thenewsjam – aho urukundo, imibanire n’amakuru agezweho bihurira. Komeza ubane natwe.